November is home to the Thanksgiving holiday – the perfect time to reflect on our attitude of gratitude. Before we get too much into preparing the turkey, bread stuffing, mash potatoes and wild rice, let’s set aside a couple of minutes preparing our mind for the occasion.
We know Thanksgiving holiday is a season of get togethers or reunions. Most students normally travel back to their respective homes to meet their families; international students, on the other hand, may be invited over to a few American homes to experience a warm and welcoming dinner.
Yet how many of us really conjecture the meaning for Thanksgiving? I have never celebrated Thanksgiving holiday back in Malaysia. In fact, most countries where my friends are from: Germany, Vietnam and China do not celebration this festival either.
So, this is something new for us.
My first Thanksgiving dinner was spent at the home of an SCSU staff member. It was an all-American dinner I had and it was indeed an experience to be cherished. What I learned last year was that there is more to just getting to meet another and have a delicious meal over turkey and candles. Thanksgiving is a time for celebrating what we have been blessed with and showing our gratitude to whom that has provided our needs.
Before we discuss the importance of showing gratitude, people have to realize what they have forgotten to appreciate during the year – or their life.
People, circumstances and expectations always keep others from truly being grateful.
It is true that sometimes bad company can influence good character. Keep away from people you know may discourage you from doing good and willing to share. Bond with those who know the beauty of life and would appreciate them. People are imperfect. People are often carried away by the happenings in everyday life and forget about that “big picture.” Imagine losing something so dear to you, like your loved ones or your favorite possession, would it be easy to see the other blessings in life and be grateful?
It is not simple.
Circumstances keep us away from being grateful for what we have or had in life. When undesired and unexpected events take place in our life, we feel so vulnerable that no one is in control of things, until we lose that attitude for gratitude. However, we need to always see the multiple sides to things happened. Be appreciative during bad times, because it may have been worse.
Finally, it is the set expectations we set for ourselves that have moved us away from being grateful. This may be the hardest aspect to realize on our own, especially because the nature of this rests in the mind. There are many pressures to be the best in life whether it is the best student, professor, or parent – so some level of respect or satisfaction is reached. But, many may not lead the life they thought they would. And that happens.
Not being able to pass a class, losing control of your rebellious son or a failed campaign could happen to anyone. Whoever endures this can still find appreciation. So much in our life is that search for bigger cars, better friends, and more luxurious lifestyle. But life is not all about things that fall into their right place. It is also about learning to stand up every time you fall. So, be grateful over failures too as they are the best lessons we could have gotten in life.
My pastor at church once said, “avoid complaining at all cost.” Every time we want to grumble over certain issue, first think of the product of such a whine. If whining doesn’t make things better, constructive evaluation does. People get overwhelmed when small matters become complaints. Since it does not really make anyone feel better, quit complaining and start learning how to problem solve and appreciate others’ efforts.
Second, and the most important how-to, is to make a personal choice to be grateful. It is not possible to force one to be appreciative if he or she doesn’t feel that way. This is what makes an attitude of gratitude special and close to heart. Every bit of “thank you” must come from the heart of that individual, which is why it is unique. The more you are grateful for what you have, the more you will receive; the more grumbling and complaints you post, the less you will receive in return; this is the way of life.
So, let’s practice this attitude of gratitude in this perfect timing of Thanksgiving.
